I Know This Road

4 02 2013

Diverging Paths

I’ve been down this road sometime ago
this sudden rush of adrenaline, I’ve felt it before
it only seems like yesterday
like a syringe injecting ecstasy through my veins
starting with laughter from down the hall
then seeing a smile on what seems like a mirror
a finally eyes meeting…
…our eyes meeting like the opposite ends of two magnets
a jolt of emotion revitalizing the body
this feeling of belonging once again
igniting my very spirit with vigor
like a tender kiss onto my heart
as I walk further a fork appears with two options:
one side leads further down the rabbit hole
and the other one far far away through the fog
I move to make my choice
but my memory violently holds me back
and I remember what awaited last time I walked deeper…
like a balancing act with the good also comes the bad
and so with the euphoria there is an encroaching dysphoria
as an empty darkness that slowly clutches my soul
starts with clouds of doubt hovering overhead
then shivers of fear down my core
just powerlessly paralyzed from head to toe
with tears of disappoint blocking my sight
all these reminders coming from the painful scars…
…the scars that sharply sting of regret on my heart
I’ve been down a road like this sometime ago
with a crossroad with similar choices
I want to believe history won’t repeat if I go further…
…but maybe I shouldn’t risk the déjà vu and walk away

I don’t know… I don’t know…


The Days In a Life After the Mayan End of the World

14 01 2013

The new year has already begun; the Mayans were wrong about the End of the World on 12/21/12… So what’s next? Or maybe the End of the World happened, just not the way we all expected it…
Mayan End of the World

Looking back at last year, there are a lot of noteworthy things. In short…: roommate getting married (first of many weddings to go to hopefully), many coworkers leaving, miniature figurines being painted, snowboarding for the first time… Well, going to keep that list short because gotta keep looking forward to the new year. This new year has a lot to live up to because 2012 ended pretty well. I guess my only regret is not moving out yet… (was meaning to do that last year). But oh well, I guess that can be this year’s New Year Resolution (that I can break this year too :P).

I think I’ll also need to plan a nice big trip this year to some foreign country (like some European countries)… I better start saving up, especially if I want to stay at an Igloo or Ice Hotel. Go big or go home right? Maybe this is the year to take some bigger chances. Let’s see what you got 2013!
20d Dice

“To get something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done.” – Thomas Jefferson

Globe of Wonder

25 12 2012

There exists a world so small
That it can be held in your hands
Where it rests peacefully and simple
As it’s protected from complexities of life
You can’t help but stare at it
Mesmerized in awe and wonder
And with a shake of the wrist
Everything has changed
Memories of familiar times surge
Cherished times in familiar places
With a mere instant
Dreams and memories collide


Sandy Shoes

2 12 2012

today I walk along the ocean side
at the beach where everyone goes
although it’s crowded
it’s a nice day for a stroll

most people are in the water having fun
the kids are making sand castles
other people are playing volleyball
and most of the older people are just tanning

the waves are crashing onto the sand
the sun is beating down on my skin
and before I know it it’s time to go
as the sun begins to set beyond the waves

while I trek back my feet feel heavy
for I’ve got sand in my shoes slowing me down
and so I dump my shoe out of all the sand
not wanting to take any of it home

but when I get home
part of the day lingers with me
as I still have some sand in my shoes
not all the sand can be left behind

I guess not all of it was a problem
for some of it just stays with you
no matter how hard you try
sand gets stuck in my shoes

Beach Walker in Sunset

The Last Drop

8 10 2012

Full bottles starts with possibility
Each sip is a symphony of euphoria
Your taste buds don’t want the fireworks to end
For the sweet taste of victory is too good to stop
But when all is said and done
The final curtain does get drawn
And all you have is an empty bottle in hand
That last drop laughed at you to the bitter end
Turning that sweet taste of victory sour
And now you’re just left with nothing
Nothing but disappoint

Sorting Out the Odds and Ends

30 08 2012

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Logically doing something over and over without any change and expecting something different is clearly somewhat insane. You know like tossing an apple in the air will always result in the apple coming back down. With reason and logic it’s makes sense. But human nature just says no. We just want the result of something to be different even though nothing has changed. History just repeats itself; the story with the same ending just with different characters.

It’s probably just the fact we do the same thing over and over because we don’t know what to change. Since people don’t know what to change they are stuck… and only thing they can do it either nothing or keep retrying. Retrying all the time isn’t the greatest thing, because obviously the chances of things to change on their own are slim to none. So you are just stuck with disappointment. On the other hand giving up… well that just isn’t a good feeling to have.

And even if you were to change things, it isn’t easy all the time. Some things are just too solid and won’t budge. Or if they are loose, they just move a tiny bit where progress is slow. And very slow progress is effectively no progress/change.

The worst is when you ask yourself the same question from a few years ago, and get the same answer back. But of course that answer isn’t the one you want. Even time can’t change everything.

Sometimes you get help, sometimes you’re alone. Sometimes you get lucky, sometimes you don’t, and sometimes you just bite the bullet and go insane.

Ask Yourself This

8 07 2012

not every question has been answered
the answer isn’t always so easy to find
it’s not like a math problem that can be reduced
nor is it a binary question with a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer
the answers aren’t in the back of a book
and they’re not online or downloadable
and someone doesn’t necessarily know it
most questions beget questions
so do your best to answer them
and when you look to yourself
you will find yourself